Happy Valentiny Day

An Ode to My Husband

You are the one who takes out the trash

and empties the diaper genie.

You are the one who brushes our kids’ teeth

because I find their use of blue toothpaste

So disgusting.

You are the one who doesn’t make a big deal

when I yell at the computer,

or forget where I put my phone

three times in an hour

                                                Every day.

You are the one who calls my phone every time I lose it

and pretend to believe me

when I say it was stolen at a restaurant

when it is really in my jacket pocket

                                                            Again.

Oh my husband,

being married to me is no picnic I’m sure.

But let us not forget our sacred vows,

and that you are also a pain in the rear

                                                            Sometimes.

Lovey-Dovey

Attention people of the world of this blog: I feel like I owe you a post. I have not written in a while, unless you count the charming posts made on my Facebook page which you should definitely check out! (Three more likes and I have 100 likes! That means I can finally start loving myself!)

I have some good ideas brewing for future mind-blowing essays, but today I just wanted to share a little something I witnessed the other day at my place of work. Just one of those little things that made me smile -- it made me happy to be alive.

A Love Story

We were all gathered for an assembly, and I was diligently policing the 50-or-so seventh graders in my area. You know, telling them to be quiet and taking their phones away and stuff. Well, wouldn't you know it, America's favorite couple was sitting in my section -- let's call them "Edward and Bella."

Edward and Bella are two adorable little misfits that found love in the hopeless place called middle school. They are really into animae, and and I think that's it, and Bella has got about a foot on Edward in the height department. I wouldn't say they are particularly affectionate (thank you Lord), but they are always together. It's an innocent love. Some may call it not really love at all.

ANYWAY, so there they are, in my section, and Bella has her arm around Edward which is pretty funny to me. Edward is all nestled-in to his lady, and they are watching the presentation, and then he does something truly amazing:

He picks his nose.

Sitting there, with his head pressed into the loving bosom of his girlfriend, just going to town on his nose and then eating it. If there were ever an image to perfectly capture the strange dichotomy of seventh grade, it was this. I turned away, to give them privacy and to not-barf, but the image stays with me.

Thank you, Universe. We needed that.